Little Darling, it seems it's been years since it's been here

Okay no, it hasn't been "years"

Well so much for that "haitus", I feel like I really really need to rant; just go on and on.

Okay, so let's start. First off, Mega is finally over. I don't really know if this is exactly a good thing or not because I'm going to miss the atmosphere in Mega. My English teacher Mr.Dahilie (I think I spelled that right), was amazing. I really liked him because I understood his explanations and also he's one of the most patient teachers ever. Now that's Mega is over for the summer, I probably won't be going back for summer classes anymore. I'll miss that. Really.

I doubt in Bayside I'll ever receive a really good education. With each school year, there's always one or two horrible teachers that simply just can't teach, unfortunately. Wow, I can't believe school is almost starting. Am I looking foward to it? I don't know. Do I care? Yes I do.

Everytime I write a blog I always wonder about something. I hope nobody reading this blog is classifying me or stereotyping me in any kind of way. I might seem very "sad" and "moopy" while blogging but that's just to rant and vent every little thing inside of me. Why? Because I feel like I can't really tell anyone about these things anymore. I mean sure, I can tell my close friends but everyone has a limited attention span. Besides, I don't really want to annoy the crap out of them. Although I love to be ranted to, when other people have problems, I just love hearing them and attempt to offer a viable solution. Plus, having deep discussions with people bring's one another closer to each other! Oh, and not to mention, I deleted a lot of my notes on Facebook just so people won't judge me; considering my notes on facebook contain poems that are often depressing. But to me, it just seems that sad things are easier to write.

So if anyone happens to be reading this, just because my blog is filled with melancholy rants doesn't mean I'm truly like that! I hope no one misjudges me.

So someone tell me, what is confidence? How does one evoke it? How does one keep it up?

I don't think I will ever find the answer to those questions because the definitions I get just don't fit anymore. So hell, I'll be wondering forever. I think some of the most confident people are undeserving of it. It's like hey, great, you have confidence to do a lot of things. However, are your motives morally good? Having too much confidence of course can result in Hubris, and no one wants that. But of course, a tad bit of confidence is ALWAYS good.

Did I ever mention on this blog? I love singing. Absolutely adore, love it. If there was one thing I could do for a living, it'd be singing and writing music. As a matter of fact, I'd spend the rest of my life doing those two things and also pick up an instrument or two. I don't know why but my ambition is simply, music. I really love it.

But like most people, my voice isn't that great. Everyone tell's me I "can't sing". It really is quite discouraging at times but I guess I can't say I'm good, If well... I'm not. But I always sing randomly anyways, outside, at home, randomly with friends.

Writing lyrics, oh yes, I love this. What other better way to vent besides writing on a blog than with lyrics. With lyrics (or even a poem), the writer or poet can hide a secret message into their peice of art. Everything I write has some sort of hidden meaning to it; at least most of them.

I think I have more of a shot at this as a carrer consider I people actually give me positive feedback on most of my writings.

Instruments, hm. I really want to learn how to play a piano because it just seems so elegant. How can someone not want to learn it? It can be fast, slow, sorrowful, happy, loving, peaceful, etc. I do play my guitar and I've gotten better at it considering it's been around a month since I've gotten it. But wow, if I could learn both? That would be amazing.

Okay I'm done for today.

Lyrics, ah this is going to be hard, but I'll go with She Is Love by Parachute

I've been beaten down, I've been kicked around

But she takes it all for me.

And I lost my faith, in my darkest days.

But she makes me want to believe.

They call her love, love, love, love, love.

They call her love, love, love, love, love.

She's all I need

Well I have my ways, they were all in vein.

But she waited patiently.

It was all the same, all my pride and shame.

But she put me on my feet.

They call her love, love, love, love, love.

They call her love, love, love, love, love.

She is Love.

Wouldn't it be awesome to have someone like that?